Bachelorette parties are like the Title IX of weddings: they're supposed to make the girls equal to the boys. If the groomsmen can take their boy out for a night of debauchery, so can we, right? As a bridesmaid, one of your jobs is to coordinate a "last hurrah" for your soon-to-be married friend. After all, now that she has a matching set of Pyrex casserole dishes, she'll probably never go to a bar ever again. She'll be too busy darning the holes in her man's socks.

PRACTICALITIES
When planning the evening, keep in mind what kind of night and activities the bride would enjoy and be sensitive to the timing of the party: she probably doesn't want to go out the night before her wedding. Puffy eyes and puking down the aisle are not what she hired the videographer for. If the other bridesmaids live far from the bride, you may want to consider having the bachelorette party at the same time as the shower.

WITH . . . AND WITHOUT
Just like they told us in high school health class, you don't need drugs or alcohol to have a good time! A great bachelorette party doesn't necessarily involve a wild night of drinking--spending time with the bride and having a good time together is the what's really important. You can enjoy any of the activities below with or without a cocktail in hand.

WARNING!
If you plan to have an alcohol heavy party, it is a good idea to provide transportation for everyone throughout the evening. After meeting at a central place, you can arrange for a car service to chauffeur your party around all night long in a limo or minivan or, if it's practical, take taxis. This is not the time for a tragic drunk-driving accident. Check out LimoRaces.com for a listing of limousine services nationwide.

PRELIMINARY ACTIVITES & GAMES
You can and probably should start with dinner, either at someone's house or at a restaurant (click here for some great eats in our City of the Month).

You can spice things up by asking guests to bring a gag gift. These usually end up being sexual, the kinds of things that even if the bride-to-be would buy for herself, she'd never admit to. This is how most brides acquire the items missing from their registries: handcuffs, flavored massage oil, feathered underwear, "massagers." We recommend checking out two great bachelorette party-planning sites for lots of interesting props and treats: www.etakit.com and www.bachelorettepartyfun.com.

Another popular activity is the quiz the groom game. Ahead of time, ask the groom some very personal questions about the relationship. Be as bold as you dare. You might start with cute questions like "where was your first kiss?" or "what's your favorite thing about Muffy?" before moving onto the more delicate realm of "what was your most embarrassing private moment?" or "how long does sex last?" (Sometimes e-mail is better for these sorts of questions.) Then ask the bride the same questions and see how many answers matched.

Or how about a game of dirty Pictionary. Embarrass everyone, not just the bride! It's quite tricky to draw some of those things.

Consider "truth or dare" or " I never." Yes, this does require reverting back to the teenage years, but just think of all the stuff you'll hear that you (probably) never even dreamed of back in high school.

TAKING IT OFF
Then there's always the stripper option. You can find them listed in the yellow pages. (Click here to find a dancer for money in our City of the Month). While some women really get into this, in other cases it just fails miserably. Gauge the crowd: few things are more pathetic than a man gyrating in a pink g-string with a room full of women who would rather be watching Martha Stewart. If you go this route, be sure to give the bride some single dollar bills to stuff into the appropriate places.

TAKING IT OUTSIDE
When in doubt, go with a classic. Getting drunk and embarrassing the bride in public (see below for suggested places) remains the most popular bachelorette party option. Some little touches might involve:

1. Preparing a special scavenger hunt for the bride. Make her work for her drinks as she collects items from the other bar patrons. Some suggestions might include a condom, a cigarette, a business card, a red-headed guy, a roll of toilet paper from the men's room or a certain kind of drink.

2. Make a special costume for the bride. We've all seen the drunken girl in a bridal veil out at a bar, haven't we? Sometimes this party veil is made of or covered with condoms. You could also give her a T-shirt or hat to wear with an obnoxious slogan or silly picture on it. Sparkly tiaras also work well.

3. Have the entire bachlorette party dress thematically, i.e. denim skirts/cowboy hats, black dresses, boas around the neck and so on. Or, as one BridesmaidAid.com visitor recommends, tell everyone to dress in the same color (Red is definitely best!). You can drink red wine and red cocktails and eat red strawberries. Be assured, you will get tons of attention. Enjoy!

4. The activity shirt. In one version, charmingly called, "suck for a buck," you adorn a T-shirt with candy and offer the males at the bar a chance to remove a piece of candy for $1. Another option is to have the bride wear a white T-shirt and ask various men at the bar to decorate it (you provide the markers).

5. If you're feeling generous, you can try this suggestion from an enterprising BridesmaidAid.com reader: Have every woman at the party wear a candy necklace, offering nibbles for $1. Give the proceeds to the bride (our reader claims to have pooled $300).

6. Have the DJ make a special announcement about the bride. Maybe even a spotlight dance for the (un)lucky lady?

WHERE TO?
Not sure where to take your party? How about . . .

For a great NYC bachelorette party experience, check out the Donkey Show (tickets $35-$45, bachlorette party info. 212-581-5700), a part-theater, part night-life extravaganza where you can boogie to Shakespeare poetry set to '70s tunes like "You Sexy Thing" and "Car Wash." It's all the rage in the big apple!

Parties of ten or more can even get a special Donkey Show Bacehlorette Package that includes free admission for the bride, a bottle of champagne and a Bacehlorette-A-Kit. Planning's easy -- just order tickets from Ticketmaster (212-307-4100 or at ticketmaster.com) and be sure to mention code TRUELOVE3. Click here to send an e-mail to enter the Donkey Show Bachelorette Package Contest and you could win a free party!

Dancing!
Another advantage of being a woman-it's socially acceptable to dance with one another! Take the party to a crazy club and dance the night away.

Singing!
One word-KARAOKE! What could be more fun than humiliating the bride with a solo performance before a touching group rendition of "That's What Friends Are For?"

Stripping!
You can always take the party to a male strip club. Give your bride a fist full o' cash and let her enjoy herself.

Oh, grow up!
Some bachelorettes may prefer a more civilized night out, or at least one that doesn't require a date with ye olde porcelain goddess the next morning. Some other great ideas for a bachelorette night are going to a play, a jazz club, a casino, a concert, going out for a decadent dinner or throwing an elegant dinner party, going to a comedy club, or going on an evening wine tasting/tour. Most places will make special accommodations for groups and can help you plan a night to remember.

NEW! Slumber Party...With a Twist
Gather at a hotel room (or a friend's living room) for good old-fashioned slumber party, with a twist. Wear your PJs, rent retro John Hughes movies like "Sixteen Candles" and "Pretty in Pink" (and thank your lucky stars you don't have to live through high school again...), and then, when you want some more grown-up fun, play kid games with an adult twist...such as breaking a penis-shaped pinata filled with sexual goodies (click here to buy one of these gems).

TAKE HER AWAY
Apopular idea, if you can swing it, is an out of town bachelorette weekend. You can go to a place that is sentimental to the bride, such as a place she went as a kid, your old alma matter, or a city where a good friend lives. You might go to the mountains, skiing, to the beach, camping, hiking, rafting, a spa or resort, or to a city that she's always wanted to go. Once you're there, you can do any, all, or none of the typical bachelorette activities listed above.

WHERE THE BUCK STOPS
The bride should not have to pay for anything during the course of the party. If it's at a restaurant or bar, the attendants pay the check. If it involves going away, you should expect to pay for the cost of activities and accommodations. She should, however, expect to pay the cost of transportation to the party. That being said, be sure that she wants to incur the cost of a plane ticket before deciding to have an out-of-town party.

Have any better ideas? Any great bachelorette stories to share? Enlighten us by sending an email to Penelope@BridesmaidAid.com.